Phyllis Alilia Herman

   Cause of her death was Lung Cancer.

  Medical Notes:

Mom was a life-long smoker and nothing could disuade her from it. In January she became ill and the doctor assured her it was nothing more than a standard case of bronchitis. After months of it not abating she finally dumped that doctor to find another and in June they diagnosed her with stage 3a non-small cell lung cancer. Then for weeks nothing happened as doctors ran endless tests to make sure their legal backs were covered. Finally in September she began treatment for it.

Radiation was first with small doses of chemotherapy. However, soon she was in agony from what seemed like a bad back. Later it was determined that she had a tumor in her spine. Radiation did help this but only very temporarily.

By Christmas she was a shell of her former self. I saw her on December 24th and she was still hopeful even though, by this point, the cancer had spread to 4 places including lymph nodes and brain. She was being told by her doctors that everything was progressing as expected but few of us believed it. She turned down hospice care because it would mean giving up. On December 26th my step-father called and we found out that she wasn't able to get out of bed and had peed in it without knowing it. She was barely lucid and they'd decided to call hospice that morning.

The hospice nurse showed up and made it clear that she was not in good shape and that all signs pointed to a quick resolution. They moved her to a hospice suite for better pain management (a very nice place surprisingly) and Butch stayed with her until 8:30pm during which time they spoke of her wishes. At 6am they called him to tell him she'd taken a turn for the worse and he immediately called us. We prepared to go in immediately. During our drive there we got a call from her neighbor telling us that Butch arrived to be told she died not long before he arrived.

We continued there to support him and say our good-byes. I tried in vain to close my mother's eyes. She actually looked better than the previous visit.

Phyllis married Richard Thomas Heimlich, son of John David Heimlich and Ruth Althea Peak, on Nov 2, 1963 in Camden, in Reverend Ziegenfuss' house. The marriage ended in divorce. (Richard Thomas Heimlich was born on Apr 28, 1942 in Camden, New Jersey.)

Phyllis next married Chester Durman.